Inside My Head

It’s dark in here. Not pitch black, nor is it lightless, it simply isn’t bright. I’ve been here multiple times. It is not entirely separate from me. It is a temple, golden and large. If it has windows I cannot see them, all I can see is a few pillars and two statues. The braziers hanging from the ceiling and pillars only light that much. I have no idea how large this place really is, it is all in shadow and gives the illusion of both compactness and largesse. The pillars are inscribed with shapes and hieroglyphs that I cannot read and pay no attention to. Sometimes there is more than just the two statues in this place. Usually they mean nothing. Someone visiting, or checking me out. They are often far off and I pay no mind. Rarely I sense others that are not gods in here. I have seen more of this place once, but only once. 

The statues are obvious. They tower above me, at least twenty feet high. The one in the center is Anpu. Ironically it is a form I don’t find aesthetically pleasing. He is merely standing, perfectly straight, occasionally holding a Was. The statue is black and gold, it wears only a circlet and skirt. Sometimes there is the headdress, but it is amorphous, easily changed. There is a plate by the feet, my latest offering. A broom lay nearby, for some reason I am often cleaning in here. It is almost never dirty though. Cleaning is the only time I see the walls, or doorways. I never go towards them, much less through them. I don’t have a reason to, and I am not particularly nosy, although I’ve never been told not to be. Next to Anpu’s statue is another. Sometimes she is on the right, sometimes on the left. Aset kneels in profile, as if She were a hieroglyph. Although I’m positive this icon is far more reminiscent of Ma’at, She has her arms outstretched with iridescent wings. Her statue is not plain, it is colorful and beautiful, a complex beauty next to Anpu’s minimalistic handsomeness. Sometimes it bears a headdress, most times it doesn’t. 

I come here often. Usually it’s simply to look at Them, to marvel at their huge statues or sit near Them. I pray in here, I offer food in here, and of course there’s the cleaning. Sometimes I sweep, other times I mop, sometimes I dust their feet. Sometimes I come here because I feel Their presence nearby or they wish to talk. I have only seen one other person in here, Dapper. Dapper is new of course. I have invited him into this place with Their permission. He never comes in as a humanoid, always in his Other shape, his wolf shape. I haven’t bothered to ask him about this, instead I put his portion of the food on the floor and pet him. We have been here more than I consciously remember. Perhaps it is the piece of my Guardian inside him that I sense that affinity for. He does belong there, in some way. Just like me.


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