Pagan Blog Project: Beauty

So I know I’m super late for the B weeks, but it’s ok because I don’t care lol For my B post it will be a devotional writing talking about how awesome my Netjer are 😀

Last week I was watching the show Frozen Planet on Animal Planet and really the images and videos they have are absolutely stunning. If you ever feel down and like the universe is ugly and hopeless, watch a show like The Universe (Discovery/Science) or Frozen Planet. You will feel better about life because it shows so much about our reality. Unique ice formations, penguins, seals, underwater life, baby penguins, wolves, wolverines and so much more to see. You even get to see into the lives of northern peoples. It is amazing.

Something else, besides “my gods our world is beautiful,” went through my mind as I was going to bed at 4 am after watching two hours of the show. It was a train of thoughts, starting with that I should write a blog post about how awesome the gods are, most especially Ra, for creating such a unique and shining world (and hell, world’s within the world, because the Arctic and Antarctic are truly universes unto themselves, so very different than the rest of the planet). I was also thinking that I wanted to write something in praise of Anpu and Set and it occurred to me that the icy ends of the earth really exemplify them.

Let’s start with Set. Lord of Chaos and the Desert. Are the icy tundras not both chaotic and like deserts? Especially Antarctica? There is an intense beauty of both the desert sands and the ice and snow. The sun blinds in both places, harsh in different ways. There is hardship everywhere. The tundra is no more forgiving than the sand dunes. Food is scarce, weather is extreme, winds are sharp, animals fight to survive so very hard. Ever seen Emperor Penguins in the Antarctic winter? They look thoroughly miserable don’t they? They are, and they’re starving. For months they huddle together in hunger and misery, but there is a prize at the end, for they hold eggs on their feet. It’s an excellent way to keep chicks from predators: stay inland, during winter, protecting them with their bodies, protecting each other. They suffer and do it greatly, but for such a great prize at the end.

And Set is in the ice, and He is in the cold. He is in the wind that stings and the darkest nights. He is also in the Southern Lights that illuminate the persistent night, He is the sweet relief of the rising sun over the horizon, and He is in the unbridled joy of the eggs hatching and the females returning.

Anpu is in the poles too. Many people know that He is a god of Death, but they often don’t realize that He is also a god of Life (He has numerous epithets, the clearest being “Lord of Life”) as well as god of the liminal and the between. I feel the plains of ice are just as representative of Him as the desert. Think about it, there are few places where the hairline balance between life and death are so clear and obvious. You see Anpu when you watch a Least Weasel* kill a vole for food (which are ADORABLE btw, both animals are) and, because it is too slender to stay warm easily, uses the vole’s skin to stay warm. You see Anpu when starving wolves fight a bison and both animals may die from injuries. But you also see Him when those female penguins come back to relieve the males and they have a touching reunion. He’s there when the sun rises and when it stops doing so, when the moon shines and the wolves howl at the Northern Lights.

The gods are everywhere, and it is awesome.

 

 

*I am a carnivore lover. There are many, many, many prey animals that I love and adore, but there are so many more carnivores that I love and adore. I will always root for both sides, I will even feel sympathy and a tinge of sadness for the prey, but I will always support carnivores and their right to live. I will always argue with those who think carnivores are savage or bloodthirsty or heartless or evil. Why? Because carnivores are none of those things. They are none of the exceedingly negative and wholly human-focused labels like the ones I mentioned. They are necessary, important and beautiful, even when hunting, even when killing, and sometimes especially so. And above all they have as much a right to live as prey. Not to mention it is incredibly hypocritical to label carnivores as evil, cruel, nasty, heartless, savage, bloodthirsty, or whatever when most humans (especially in America) consume meat in much larger than healthy quantities. Carnivores do not see killing the way humans do, they never ever kill without reason or out of cruelty or spite. They kill to survive, to live, to protect themselves or their young. They are beautiful, they are wonderful, and I say kill on.

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This…

Let me point out that there are four “people” in this dream: myself, my boyfriend (his name is Josh) and two fictional characters who also represent us. I don’t know where this dream came from.

I’m in an open air market, no idea why, but it had lots of interesting things as one might expect an open air market to have. I was looking for gifts for several people, but my alternate self was the most important. At first I was looking alone but eventually Josh as Akihiko came over to help. We were looking through a variety of things. At this point I’d already picked out a few small things, jewelry mostly if I recall correctly.

We kept walking around, standing in front of one particular stand for a while, debating different things. Getting the right gift was really important, I can’t remember the object we were arguing over getting or not, but it would make other me very happy and was important for some kind of thing. It might have had something to do with physical health or spirituality, but I’m not sure. Eventually he called me over to something else, a black bag that the stand was selling. A “deluxe gift bag” if you will, already full of stuff.

We started looking through it, and that’s where the necklaces were. We were astounded by all that was in it, especially considering how cheap the price was for real jewelry. Gold necklaces and a yellow mineral that for the life of me I can’t place. Mustard yellow with brown squiggles, maybe the color of sulfur. There were also pieces of light and dark jade, some on necklaces, some not. They were very pretty, carved into statuettes, but generic ones. That’s when I found the quartz. It was big, a double quartz point about two or three inches long and a thumb’s width. It was perfect, clear like glass and flawless, clean, wire wrapped on a chain. It was probably the clearest image in the entire dream and when I say it was perfect it was perfect.

We kept going through it, that’s when the dream sort of zoomed out to be third person, and I can’t be sure if I was still there or my alternate self, but it’s possible. There were also six Beanie Babies in the pouch, they really shouldn’t have fit, the bag wasn’t that big, but two of them I knew and the other four I didn’t. I was flabbergasted to see my leopard and my sister’s zebra in there (that would be Freckles and Ziggy). The other four are Beanie Babies I don’t think exist.  I know there was at least one bird among the other four, but I just remember a rainbow one and a white one, maybe a yellow one. I’m not sure. Something about them is important, but perhaps the only ones really important are Freckles and Ziggy. They are paired together and all of my Beanie Babies are special to me. I don’t know if I actually got the bag. I know at some point we walked away and ended up in a real store, something akin to Walmart (huge white store, seems legit right?) to keep looking for gifts. This is when real Josh showed up, to help keep looking. I don’t think we found anything in there, but the dream was interrupted by my mom calling my phone, coincidentally with a potential part time job idea. I can’t say I bought anything for sure, but I think I did.

Tagged!

From Per Ma: House of the Lion she tagged me a good bit ago and I figured I’d do it. I need to write but I still don’t know what I’m writing yet so yeah, enjoy lol

liebster

1. The bloggers have to have 200 or fewer followers.

2. There is a list of question to answer from your nominator as well as having to come up with a list of questions for your own nominees. You can either use the same questions as was asked of you or make up new ones for your nominees.

3. Copy/paste the award logo into your post. You can add it to your blog sidebar or footer if you wish.

4. Notify your nominees of the nomination.

 

  • What inspired you to start a blog?

I like writing, am random, think a lot, and enjoy my own personal space to just blurb. It quickly became about my religion as well once I started on Kemetism.

  • Have you been achieving any of the goals set out with your blog?

I don’t think I really set goals lol I didn’t even think I’d get followers and now I have almost thirty :3 or at least I have thirty registered, I have several lurkers who float around uncounted XD

  • Which moment in your life do you currently find the most awe inspiring?

umm, how great my boyfriend Zolfyer is and how hard he’s working and has worked? He’s great at managing money (and thank the gods for that!) Oh, umm, I guess some of my interactions with the Netjer at times as well.

  • What is a fear you’d like to overcome / have overcome?  If you’ve overcome it, how did you do it?

hmmm, I don’t know. I have to think about that. Maybe as some fears I want to overcome would be fear of writing for the Netjer and the uncertainty of the future.

  • How do you handle unfortunate situations?

Depends on the situation and how it made me feel lol sometimes I handle it well, other times I don’t. In general I am an angry crybaby XD

  • What is your favorite holiday?  Why?

well, I suppose Christmas and Easter used to be. I currently don’t have a favorite holiday.

  • What is a tradition you hope to pass on, be it to your children or to other generations in your community?

Not being an ass to people just because they are different from you for any number of reasons

  • What is your view of the Divine, be it from a believer or non-believer’s standpoint?

I’m a polytheist, the Divine is many things, but mostly bigger beings with a lot of power and control over the universe. My view has changed a lot since becoming a pagan.

  • You have just attained your dream life.  Describe it in 140 words maximum.

Wife, mother, Kemetic, nurse, writer, musician, painter. Big house, pets, happy chibis, happy husband, bilingual, probably in a different country (Sweden or Japan).

Catching Up

So, I know I’ve been gone for a while. Quite a bit has happened; not all of what I wanted to talk about I remember. I remember having an epiphany that will probably make life a little easier. This had to do with something Aubs wrote a little while ago (or was it Devo?), about blocking oneself. It made me think that perhaps for some things I am blocking myself. That’s when the epiphany happened and my brain spilled the beans about some things I already knew but didn’t really think about. Things I’ll be working on and may do an execration for later in the week or something. I like burning things but I don’t have anything nifty to burn things in, so I may just have to go fireless (boohoo).

I was also thinking of doing a spell for jobs and stuff. Right now TB and I are still with the staffing company and it’s getting harder to save as more bills pop up, like his school bill. I did ask Anpu and Set if they could tell me what’s up with all this stuff and what I could do to find my way on this wibblywobbly path, but I got a confusing dream as an answer. Right now I’m just trying to go about life and see what I can do to make things easier.

Speaking of prayer and magic, I moved my room around. Let me tell you it was hard >.> I’m not all that strong and I have solid wood bedroom furniture. Even completely empty with all the drawers removed it took a lot of effort to move my bureau from one side of the room to another. Add in the bed, the bookcase, cleaning, and moving smaller items I was exhausted by the end. However! Moving my room around enabled me to carve out a space to pray at and light candles on. It’s not much, I have a trunk that serves as a great flat surface and there’s only candles there, but it’s an actual space. Now I just wish I had some statues (can you see Set and Anpu roll their eyes and sigh? I can XD)

I’m likely going to start looking for new jobs soon. There’s nothing wrong with the one I have really. I like the kid I work with (even though he seeks to destroy my nerves at times) and I like the place I work. The problem really is how much I make and how easily the job can be taken from me. I honestly don’t make enough money, not for the time I spend there and the travel I do or how much effort the child requires. And certainly not for a job that isn’t permanent. I’m just conflicted because the kid does need someone and he’s doing better with me there and is getting attached to me (not to say I’m not getting attached to him).

Really the person I’m worried about is TB though. He needs a job in his field and isn’t getting one. All the effort he put in school, he really enjoys graphic design too. He’s been looking since he graduated and he is having worse luck with cases than I am. I just want him to find a job in his field that he’ll like. I’m hoping and praying that one of these recent firms he’s contacted will respond positively and hire him. He could use the confidence boost anyway and he would be ecstatic to have a job that he likes and that is steady and permanent. Hell, I would be beyond ecstatic at that, because he would be happy and it’s what he wants and likes.

On yet another note, I think Aset has decided to back away until I’m actually ready for Her. The other night when I went to pray and light Her candle it refused to light. Like, the lighter wouldn’t light and when it did the wick wouldn’t catch. I told Her I got the hint and I haven’t felt Her presence since. That’s ok I guess, I still liked having Her around, but it’s not like I’m going to be jumping into the mommy and wife roles anytime soon. Guess I’m back to the boys’ club huh? Well, now I’m going to go to bed because I’ve stayed up way too late working on a new resume and setting up accounts on job hunting websites as a childcare provider. We’ll see what the morning brings I guess!

Anubis

I’ve decided I’m going to do the Pagan Blog Project this year. I know, I’m a day late. I knew I was going to do a post for Anpu, though I couldn’t decide if I would do His for the first week or the second, but it just kept invading my head so yeah. Maybe I’ll do one for Aset? I’m not sure, I’ll likely write a normal blog post after this so you’ll get two posts. Anyways, on with the show yes?

I’ve written plenty of posts on my main deity (though Set loves to troll and take first dibs on things), but I have to say I love writing about Him. He’s a quiet deity, but never mistake quiet for weak. Anpu is often around, a quiet and comforting presence. He is also a powerful presence, like listening to thunder in the middle of the night. In general it is just rolling and deep, a threat that isn’t a threat, a hidden sound reminding you that there is great strength. I’m sure I sound a little cheesy, but I’d bet His voice would remind me of thunder. You can’t see thunder, you can only hear it; you only know it’s there when it comes upon you. You can’t anticipate thunder, sometimes it comes right on the heels of its lightning and sometimes it doesn’t. Thunder can also be terribly frightening. I’m 21 years old and there are times that thunder wakes me up and terrifies me, sometimes with no lightning to be seen from a window. I think that’s the scariest type, the kind that crashes like falling buildings and explosions but no lightning to speak of. What happened to it? Where did it land? What sort of bolt could make such a terrifying noise? That, is Anpu I think. Normally placid, calm, but capable of being terrible and ferocious. I like that about Him.

I will admit (and probably have admitted elsewhere) that I initially researched Anpu out of love of canines and His canid head. Of course I found out that He is incredibly awesome, even more awesome than I ever thought. I always thought He was a cool and interesting deity even though all I knew of Him was His role as Divine Embalmer and a deity of death. For some reason that just never grew on me, I always just liked Him; regardless of His role in death or what The Mummy (1999) had to say about Him. Or what any class in school didn’t say about Him. I don’t know, it was just always a feeling that He was awesome. And I can’t tell you how happy I was to be proved utterly correct. He is a very important presence in my life and in my head now and I’m still getting to know Him, but I look forward to that.